12 Things I learned to do as a stay-at-home-mom

Photographer - Photos By Carrie (Medicine Hat, AB)

Disclaimer: I have 5 year old twins. I’m sure some of this will work for older kids too, but I don’t have my own personal experience with that. Also, everyone obviously has their own priorities and I’m not shoulding on you. This is just what I have found works for us😊

1. Stay on a schedule. Have some sort of routine so the kids know what to expect and having a set bedtime is still very important! (and this fact I know is relative to all kids). I know there is an urge to let them stay up late, but it does not benefit their health and during this time it is very important to keep them as healthy as possible.

2. Wake up before the kids. My kids wake up between 630-7; my alarm goes off at 5-530. I have found I need this time to get myself prepped before the mini twinado of a morning. I start my day in peace with a coffee (or sometimes exercise) instead of being launched into overwhelm and chaos. Getting something from my to-do list checked off early (or just scrolling Facebook sometimes) is really good for my mental health.

3. Start the day with a cuddle. This is our way of starting the day in a positive way, feeling connected to each other before anything else clouds our minds. (Sometimes my kids sneak a book or 10 into there as well)

4. If you don’t get dressed in the morning (or rather…for the whole day) there is less laundry to do. Fact.

5. Get creative with mealtime (and I’m not talking about WHAT you eat… although you could do that too if you want.) I hate cooking and cleaning and eating at the table 3x a day (at least). Here’s some of the creating things I have done:

- Bathtub supper! My kids love it. They sit in the tub while eating and clean up is so easy! Just wash it away…(this is probably one of the things that won’t really work for older kids?)

- Picnic! Inside, outside, under the table, in a fort… We just throw a towel down to sit on and then when you are done just roll it up and shake it out.

- Wagon. I pack a little lunch kit lunch and they eat while I walk.

- What can you come up with?

6. Let them be bored. If they are bored long enough, they get creative in how to not be bored. If you always try to entertain them, you will always have to entertain them.

7. Hide. My kids are sometimes overwhelmingly attached and the only way I get much of a break is when they don’t see me. Even a few minutes to myself is nice.

8. Do boring things so they get bored of you so you can do what you want in secret. “I’m just going to do some laundry!” I’m not lying… I’m actually doing the laundry in their closet; they just don’t know that I also brought my iPad and headphones and I’m secretly watching Greys Anatomy. They usually don’t notice how long it takes and when they come in for a minute there is lots of laundry to hide the iPad. (This is also when you can eat the good chocolate or something you don’t want to share). I don’t often do this, mostly in September when the new season of Greys comes on Netflix.

9. Limit screen time. If you let them, they will become addicted (Like us. Can you honestly say you aren’t addicted to your phone? I can’t). If you get them in the habit of filling their day with other things, they won’t know what they are missing. During this isolation I will be reading the book “Glow Kids” – I want to recommend it but I haven’t read it yet… Stay tuned.

Our version of getting outside often involves horses.

10. Get outside as much as possible! Fresh air and nature is so good for everyone.

11. Praise the good things. Give them positive feedback when they do something good because if you only give them attention when they are in trouble, they will create trouble to get your attention (even if its negative attention). This does not mean only when they do something extra good, like a chore. If they are playing nice with a sibling, bring it up. If they are sharing, bring it up. If they are sitting nice at the table, bring it up. If you find them doing homework without you asking, praise it. If they clean up right when you ask, make sure they know you saw them. If they are mad and show it appropriately (not hitting or throwing) talk about it. Etc. Etc.

12. Give them attention/ play. As much as I spend part of my day trying to avoid them or promote independence, I also spend a whole lot of time doing more motherly things too. We cook/ bake, do puzzles, play, read, they help me with laundry, they exercise with me, and they are usually right beside me even when we aren’t actually doing things together. I make it a priority to respond to them with eye contact and my whole attention (when I can- if I am in the middle of something I will make sure they know it will be a minute) because I want them to know they are important to me.

What about you?? Have you found anything helpful for getting through the days at home (whether you are a stay at home parent or just powering through this isolation)? I would love to read your comments below!